Thursday, January 23, 2014

Random Thoughts

Warning:: This post might not make any sense, but I'm just going to go with it.

I woke up this morning feeling totally normal.  It'll be a good day with my girls.  I actually got to sleep last night.  Libby wasn't up every second of every hour coughing her lungs out.

My goodness it's cold in here, so we added some blankets and scarves to go with our jammies and we snuggled for a bit longer than usual.

See?  Totally normal, no one about to lose their damn mind

But then I don't know what happened.  I just kind of snapped.  I couldn't take one more kid coughing in my face.  Or asking for more juice, or this wasn't the kind of cereal I wanted. 

Oh Mom, you just poured the milk in your cereal?  You probably should have waited for that because now I have to go to the bathroom, like right.now.  You're cereal is going to be soggy by the time you get to eat it, you know.

Mom, can I have a napkin? Mom, can I have a Kleenex?

Really, they weren't doing anything wrong. It's just, it's just, it's just that it's the DEAD of winter and we're stuck inside because it's 500 degrees below zero AGAIN and everyone and their brother has a cough or a fever or the pukes or the poops or a bad attitude.

See totally losing my damn mind.

My Mom and I have this weird connection.  She always seems to know the exact second I'm about to lose my mind {or lost it, in this case}.  It's happened too many times to keep track of.  This morning she sent a text asking if everyone was healthy and I went off.  "Mom, I'm going batshit crazy..."

I gave myself a 5 minute time out. I text Delores "How many days until the pool opens?" I liked her response: "We are one day closer."

Grandpa read my mind because he sent me a text totally out of the blue "Only 56 days until Spring!"

Lesson? surround yourself by positive people.  I'm usually a glass half full kind of gal, but we all have our days, and today is my day. 

It won't take me long, I'll be back, probably even before Daddy gets home and all will be well and he'll have no clue what the poor girls have been through today.

I did apologize to them, the girls.  "Girls, Mommy's sorry she kind of lost her mind during breakfast this morning.  I didn't mean to snap and shout at you."  It's good to let them know we're not all perfect. 

I'm not sure if I should be more worried though, because they didn't really know what I was talking about.  Either there was more going on in my head than out my mouth, or this is a common occurrence and they're used to it??

Staying home ain't for wimps I tell ya.  It's not all rainbows and unicorns like some people think.  Yes, it has MANY perks,  but it's tough stuff.  I'm not saying one is harder or easier than the other. I love where I'm at and I wouldn't trade it for the world, but that doesn't mean it's easy.

 Oh that's right, I was going to quote an awesome explanation of this. Hold on a sec, let me go get that for you: {here's the whole post}

"How was my day?

The question would linger in the air for a moment while I stared at Craig and the baby shoved her hand in my mouth like they do –  while the oldest screamed MOMMY I NEED HELP POOING from the bathroom and the middle one cried in the corner because I NEVER EVER EVER let her drink the dishwasher detergent. NOT EVER EVEN ONCE, MOMMY!!! And I’d look down at my spaghetti stained pajama top, unwashed hair, and gorgeous baby on my hip – and my eyes would wander around the room, pausing to notice the toys peppering the floor and the kids’ stunning new art on the fridge . . .

And I’d want to say:

How was my day? Today has been a lifetime. It was the best of times and the worst of times. There were moments when my heart was so full I thought I might explode, and there were other moments when my senses were under such intense assault that I was CERTAIN I’d explode. I was both lonely and absolutely desperate to be alone. I was saturated- just BOMBARDED with touch and then the second I put down this baby I yearned to smell her sweet skin again. I was simultaneously bored out of my skull and completely overwhelmed with so much to do. Today was too much and not enough. It was loud and silent. It was brutal and beautiful. I was at my very best today and then, just a moment later, at my very worst. At 3:30 today I decided that we should adopt four more children, and then at 3:35 I decided that we should give up the kids we already have for adoption. Husband – when your day is completely and totally dependent upon the moods and needs and schedules of tiny, messy, beautiful rug rats your day is ALL OF THE THINGS and NONE OF THE THINGS, sometimes within the same three minute period. But I’m not complaining. This is not a complaint, so don’t try to FIX IT. I wouldn’t have my day Any.Other.Way. I’m just saying- it’s a hell of a hard thing to explain- an entire day with lots of babies."

It's worth clicking that link and reading the rest of her post.  She nailed it!!

So, I'm having one of those days.

Also, MN parents should get some sort of award.  My sister has said it before, just the getting ready to get out the door.  But seriously, how amazing would it be to go for an afternoon walk to the park?! I know I know, I love MN and I really do even love MN Winter, but there are just some days when we've had enough and the grass is always greener on the other side.  Especially when in the back of your mind, is it really only 56 days until Spring, because I'm pretty sure last year that wasn't the case.

Okay, one quick story and then I'll be all rainbows and unicorns again. 

My Libby, she's a stubborn one just like her Mama.  Yesterday morning, as we were trying to get out the door to bring Sally to school, kind of took the cake. 

She REFUSED to let me help her put her socks on.  Have you ever tried putting socks on a toddler?  It's not easy {are there awards for that too?} Have you ever seen a toddler with their little chubby, still trying to figure out how to correctly use them, hands try and put on socks?  It's ain't easy for them {Ain't nobody got time for that!}

The clock is ticking the patience dwindling. 

In the middle, stubborn toddler was encouraged to walk outside without shoes or socks on {I'm all about natural consequences!} to see that yes, her MOTHER IS RIGHT!!  She quickly learned how cold it was, but still REFUSED to let her mother help with said socks and boots. 

So mother and calmly waiting first born, close the door and head to the car while stubborn toddler finishes her damn tantrum.  A minute later I went up to find Toddler ready to let mother help put her socks and boots and hat and coat and mittens on so we could finally go bring calm big sister to school.

"Libby no make good choices. Libby do it sometimes, Libby need help sometimes."  Libs, you might also want to add that your mom is always right, just trust her.

Alright, time for Rainbows and Unicorns:

This morning the Pandora Gods were on my side and kept our spirits high with awesome Disney songs. 

We painted and took breaks to dance, like really dance, to the good songs.

Here are a few of our current favorites. 





In a week I turn 30.  My golden birthday, actually.  I keep trying to tell myself that this is a big deal.  In the morning on the treadmill I think "Only ___days until I have to enter 30 for my age."  But you know what? I'm kind of looking forward to it.  I've never been one to really care about my age.  I think I see it more as, my age is finally catching up with where I'm at in life....according to our society that is.  I mean, I'm 30, I'm happily married and have been for 5 1/2 years. I have 2 children, one of which is 4 1/2 and I stay home, and have been for 4 years! I'm surrounded by positive, loving and supportive family and friends.

So 30, yeah, I'm going to be 30 and I'll wear it like a badge of honor :)  {See, I'm a glass half full kind of girl}

Sally learned some important life lessons the other morning, it was a proud parent moment.  She donated her very own piggy bank money to help feed children in Haiti. 

After she collected her money and went to brush her teeth she came back out.  "Mom, I'm not sure I want to give that much of my money away."

"Okay Honey, you don't have to, let's talk about it for a minute.  Do you still have money left in your piggy bank?"

S: Yeah, kind of a lot

M: What is the money you're giving away for?

S: Ummm, for kids who don't have food to eat like me and Libby do.

M: The ever so important pause to let them process on their own.

S: Nevermind, they need food and I still have money.  It's okay, we can leave it.  Can I maybe give more on Friday again?

M: proud, teary-eyed mother. "Yes, sweet girl, we can give more on Friday."


Happy Glass Half Full Kind of Day!

3 comments:

  1. All I can say is "what goes around comes around" ;-) Libby (socks). Sally (giving)

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  2. Awesome post Jacks! Love you girls!!

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  3. LOVE LOVE LOVE this post, Jackie! You have always been such a positive spirit in my life, and today you helped me see the glass even fuller :)

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