Wow, you guys weren't kidding when you said three is harder than two. This Sally is too smart for her own good.
She's been a handful as of lately when playing with kids younger than she is. She intentionally pushed a 15 month old down at the park. She takes toys out of any one year old that comes near her. I have to keep reminding myself, this too shall pass. It's just a phase.
I guess what makes it so hard for us is that Sally is smart, very smart. So sometimes we forget that she's just three, that this stuff is probably normal.
**Insert example, this just happened**
I'm sitting at the table writing this post and I see Sally walk by headed toward my bedroom.
Me: Sally, what are you doing?
Sally: I have to go poop
20 minutes earlier, she was going to the bathroom before heading up for books, prayers and bed. She went poop and as I was wiping her {sorry to those of you who don't have kids and that's not a part of your every day activities, so that is probably gross for you} said wait I have more. Ooops, never mind. "Sally, are you sure you don't have more?" Smirk on her face, "Yep, I'm done."
She totally thought to herself. After Daddy puts me to bed I can get up again to go poop. I won't get in trouble because they'll be happy I'm going on the toilet instead of my diaper. {She is on her last pack of diapers at night as she's been consistently dry}
Do we reward or scold? Will it become a habit or a one time thing?
Okay, back to the park. So Sally knocked this little boy down. I made her apologize, but she didn't really care. In fact, later that night she said she wanted to go back to the park, play with the little girl she met, the mom and the dad and under her breath said "and push Miles down."
She went to bed right after that. Even though it was an hour before her actual bed time.
I was talking with my neighbor who happens to be a long time kindergarten teacher. "Do you think it is jealousy from Libby, she's trying to get attention?"
Her opinion, I think, is spot on. She feels inferior. When she is playing with kids her age or a little older she's always pleasing them, making sure they like her, she's being kind, she's sharing, she's doing the things they want to do. Being unkind to children younger than she is, is her way to feel like she is in control, holds the power.
So now what? Any opinions and advice would be appreciated :)
Other than figuring this stuff out, we had a pretty great weekend.
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| Swingin |
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| Very excited to go to the yellow park, as it is usally too hot |
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| Her park friend, Grace. They are a day apart. |
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| Moring stroll with Daddy, her first time biking to the park |
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| Very Proud |
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| Climbing the wall |
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| My little Love! |
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| Cheeeeese |
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| Morning walk around Lake Harriet |
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| Once we got to "the castle" she knew it was the end of the walk |
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| Spinning like Belle |
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| Giggles with Daddy |
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| Silly kisses |
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| Playing with the letters so mommy can get dinner ready |
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| Look at me, I'm a big girl! |
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| Hi Guys! |
Pictures from the rest of the weekend and the "You Betcha" festival to come tomorrow!
Three is a tough age. I wonder if it's just as tough with the second kid, probably depends on the kid. It seems like the good times are even better at 3 and the bad times are that much worse. I have no advice but to just be consistent, which I know you are :-) This too shall pass (like my lack of sleep phase...RIGHT?!?!)
ReplyDeleteJacks, in my experience with first grade...most kids test social boundaries at one time or another. It's how they learn what is acceptable and what isn't. I find that if young kids haven't tested these boundaries, they are often the kids in first grade that have a tough time sticking up for themselves, taking learning risks, or are often taken advantage of in social settings by other kids. Or, the kids that tested boundaries and didn't have parents that followed through with logical consequences (threats without follow through) are exactly the opposite and end up taking advantage of others. They have difficulty getting along with others and problem solving. I think it's perfectly normal that Sally is trying to figure it out and you are doing a great job keeping her accountable. At the beginning of the school year I always have the kiddos come up with what having a friend looks like, sounds like, and feels like and I refer to it all year long (I make a colorful chart and write exactly what they say so they know the chart has their words). When something happens we refer to the chart and I try to have the child "fix the wrong" by replacing what was broken or repair "broken" feelings. You are awesome at follow through and you give Sally tons of social opportunities that will help her learn her roles in social situations. She'll get through it and it will pass. :) You're a great mama so keep doing what you're doing!
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