Crazy Church Lady

Well, now that I've introduced the cyber world to Crazy Church lady, I might as well keep going with some things.  Because this friend of mine keeps encouraging me to do so, and there's been some affirmation.

Yesterday when I shared this image with my Instagram post:

My friend who has been encouraging me to post had to laugh.  The night prior, she had that very image come to mind in prayer, and I had no idea of it before I posted it. She was the sneaky photographer of this picture of me praying in the Adoration chapel before heading to our Women's Retreat.

Then, when I finished posting...which, is so out of my comfort zone, so there were some nerves behind the scene, I go to turn on KTIS and wouldn't you know it, Nobody was playing, the song I referenced yesterday :)

So, here I am today (picture is from a month ago, don't worry, I'm sheltering in place)

With the churches being closed, we're so longing for the Eucharist and the true presence of Christ. Last week the Lord guided my heart in helping me to realize that the strength of Christ has built up in us slowly and beautifully through all of our encounters with the Eucharist over our entire life.  Here are my actual journal pages.  Take from it what you will!

The verse comes from John 6:39

and then the perfect song to match these journal pages

I Have This Hope by Tenth Avenue North:

I Have This Hope

Tenth Avenue North

As I walk this great unknown
Questions come and questions go
Was there purpose for the pain?
Did I cry these tears in vain?

I don't want to live in fear
I want to trust that You are near
Trust Your grace can be seen
In both triumph and tragedy

I have this hope
In the depth of my soul
In the flood or the fire
You're with me and You won't let go

But sometimes my faith feels thin
Like the night will never end
Will You catch every tear
Or will You just leave me here?

But I have this hope
In the depth of my soul
In the flood or the fire
You're with me and You won't let go

Yes, I have this hope
In the depth of my soul
In the flood or the fire
You're with me and You won't let go

So, whatever happens I will not be afraid
Cause You are closer than this breath that I take
You calm the storm when I hear You call my name
I still believe that one day I'll see Your face

I have this hope
In the depth of my soul
In the flood or the fire
You're with me

I have this hope
In the depth of my soul
In the flood or the fire
You're with me and You won't let go

In the flood or the fire
You're with me and You won't let go

In the flood or the fire
You're with me and You won't let go

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Jason Ingram / Michael Donehey / Jeff Owen

I Have This Hope lyrics © Essential Music Publishing, Fun Attic Music, LLC

Enjoy the SUNSHINE and warmer weather that is returning this weekend!

Lentiest Lent Thoughts

I was encouraged by a friend to share some thoughts. I'm not really that great with words, that's why I stick with mostly pictures, but here goes, I guess.

As you may or may not know, I gave up Social Media for Lent. I was "challenged" a few times to enter back in to the Social Media world once Covid-19 became bigger and bigger and the Shelter in Place became longer and longer. I was told there were really beautiful things going on in the cyber world and that I should be a part of it.

I still didn't enter back in.

As Easter was getting closer and closer I struggled with knowing if I should log back in or not.

I started a new prayer practicum with friends from church. It's been pretty powerful. Each morning I spend 31 minutes in dedicated prayer, with a specific verse and I journal about what the Lord has brought to mind, or what I have swirling in my head. It's been pretty awesome.

Like I said, I'm not great with words, so journaling isn't something I've typically taken the time to do. However, I've started to realize during my morning prayer time that the words that get put down on paper aren't always my words. The Lord is definitely directing them.

This isn't something that can just happen to me, what I've learned over a few short weeks, is that anyone can have this. All you need to do is schedule the time. Put in the effort. Just as you would if you wanted to train for a marathon or learn a new hobby.  Allow the time to learn and grow.

As I was getting ready to pray one morning, I was reminded of a friend who had sent me a text the day prior, she said,"Don't forget to ask the Lord for BIG things, nothing is too mighty. Be bold in prayer!"

I was praying with Ephesians 2:1-10 and the verse that jumped out at me was verse 7: "He might show the immeasurable riches of His grace in His kindness to us."

I wrote:
He can do anything. He can move mountains and raise people from the dead. Be bold in my prayers. Why limit what the LORD can do? 

I often ask for peace and comfort and give gratitude for all that has been given to me.  Do I not believe that He can do BIG things? Is that why I don't ask? Do I just not like to ask for help? Do I think my problems aren't dire compared to what is going on in the world? Or am I content with the over abundant blessings I have?

and then the LORD took over and responded to me...
My dear Jackie, you're not afraid. You were born with a heart of gratitude, not despair. You're willing to use my strength to face your challenges that come your way.  You easily look around challenges for the good that already surrounds you and ahead to what good will come from the challenges.  Your grateful heart consoles my sorrowful heart that you worry so much about from Saint Faustina's Diary.  

Don't let the outside world create a storm in your calm heart.  Be wary of social media.  Use it to reveal your grateful heart in times of distress.  When you pray (I was going to write say, but the pen wrote pray, so I continue to know the LORD is directing all of this) JESUS, I TRUST IN YOU, you really do.  Don't doubt yourself.  I delight in you, Dear Daughter. You have eyes of Faith to see my graces throughout your days.  Those moments will sustain your heart during this storm.  

I am.  My love is always a constant, it never waivers. Continue to bring and draw others in to my sacred heart.  Jackie, this is your story, keep sharing it.  You have a way of drawing people in to trust in my love.  I have sustained you and you are aware of that and have a way of showing others the strength of my love.  

So, here I am, crazy church lady, sharing some of my early morning conversations with the LORD, because he told me to do so...

Please listen to this song as this is how I often feel :)  I'm just a nobody!

Stay tuned for another post on the Eucharist, that I was also encouraged to share...